Pre-Production: Second Tutorial with Simon - Script Amendments
After Simon read our first draft we were given some advice to improve it further.
Simon said our characters were very strong and detailed and this came across strongly through the script however the challenge will lie within the casting. This is something I need to focus on as I am responsible for ensuring the casting is strong and the actors we get are right for the roles we have created. I have created an advert for our production to get the casting ball rolling. As we are in need of a much older cast it will be a challenge to get a selection of applicants for auditions as older cast can be hard to find. Simon suggested speaking to George Wing about finding older cast as he managed to successfully get 7 older actors to perform in his film.
In terms of script amendments Simon suggested that we get rid of the appearances of the Grandchildren and make it more black and white as to the characters motivations. For example, the audience needs to be able to understand and sympathise with what is at stake for these characters. By removing any contact that Annie and Dean have with their grandchildren highlights how they have no contact and it is what they are ultimately striving for.
We have also come to the conclusion that our title Young & Famous will represent what each character wants to be. We've considered that Annie will represent the wanting of being Young and Dean representing the drive to become Famous. Although they dabble in both Young & Famous their characters lean towards one more than the other.
In order to make the characters motivations more obvious from the beginning we have chosen to introduce Young & Famous with a teaser before the opening titles begin. Through research we have found that most British sitcoms begin with a teaser as it introduces to the audience what will happen or what the show will be about. In our case we wanted to highlight from the beginning that Annie & Dean are trying to get hold of their children and grandchildren by having them spying in a park on their grandchildren playing tennis. In this teaser we also wanted to introduce where the idea of them becoming Young & Famous came from and what has motivated them into changing their lifestyle completely.
Moving on from the teaser we have added an establishing shot of where the show is set to introduce the character's home and what their living conditions are like.
We have kept the first scene the same only making minor changes to the dialogue to make it funnier and quicker. We have also left the scene with Betty alone as we feel that at the moment it doesn't need changing. We decided to change the scene discussing the grandchildren to Dean baking some cookies for the cooking show he has applied for. The scene is now about whether or not Dean could create a spaghetti bolognese for the show and how he will make it inspired by Lady and the Tramp. The clock will then begin chiming like the last draft. The scenes from then on only have minor changes to them to make them funnier.
Once this draft is complete it will be added into the Pre-Production Book.
Simon said our characters were very strong and detailed and this came across strongly through the script however the challenge will lie within the casting. This is something I need to focus on as I am responsible for ensuring the casting is strong and the actors we get are right for the roles we have created. I have created an advert for our production to get the casting ball rolling. As we are in need of a much older cast it will be a challenge to get a selection of applicants for auditions as older cast can be hard to find. Simon suggested speaking to George Wing about finding older cast as he managed to successfully get 7 older actors to perform in his film.
In terms of script amendments Simon suggested that we get rid of the appearances of the Grandchildren and make it more black and white as to the characters motivations. For example, the audience needs to be able to understand and sympathise with what is at stake for these characters. By removing any contact that Annie and Dean have with their grandchildren highlights how they have no contact and it is what they are ultimately striving for.
We have also come to the conclusion that our title Young & Famous will represent what each character wants to be. We've considered that Annie will represent the wanting of being Young and Dean representing the drive to become Famous. Although they dabble in both Young & Famous their characters lean towards one more than the other.
In order to make the characters motivations more obvious from the beginning we have chosen to introduce Young & Famous with a teaser before the opening titles begin. Through research we have found that most British sitcoms begin with a teaser as it introduces to the audience what will happen or what the show will be about. In our case we wanted to highlight from the beginning that Annie & Dean are trying to get hold of their children and grandchildren by having them spying in a park on their grandchildren playing tennis. In this teaser we also wanted to introduce where the idea of them becoming Young & Famous came from and what has motivated them into changing their lifestyle completely.
Moving on from the teaser we have added an establishing shot of where the show is set to introduce the character's home and what their living conditions are like.
We have kept the first scene the same only making minor changes to the dialogue to make it funnier and quicker. We have also left the scene with Betty alone as we feel that at the moment it doesn't need changing. We decided to change the scene discussing the grandchildren to Dean baking some cookies for the cooking show he has applied for. The scene is now about whether or not Dean could create a spaghetti bolognese for the show and how he will make it inspired by Lady and the Tramp. The clock will then begin chiming like the last draft. The scenes from then on only have minor changes to them to make them funnier.
Once this draft is complete it will be added into the Pre-Production Book.
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